Resilience

 Resilience is not some fixed trait. Its not elusive some people have some people don’t. It’s actually requires very ordinary processes just willingness to give them a go. We all have moments in life where our life path splits and the journey we thought we were going down veers of some terrible direction that we never anticipated and we certainly didn’t want. These are my go to strategies that I relied upon and saved me in my darkest days. So number one resilient people get that shit happens. They know that suffering is part of life and knowing this stops you from feeling discriminated against when the tough times come. We seem to live in an age an age where we’re entitled to a perfect life, where shiny, happy photos on Instagram are the norm when actually the very opposite is true. Number two resilient people are really good at choosing carefully where they select their attention. As humans, we are really good at noticing threats and weaknesses. Our Stress response is permanently dialed up. Resilient people don’t diminish the negative but they also have worked out away tuning into the good. Find the language that works for you, but whatever you do, make an intentional deliberate ongoing effort to tune into what’s in your world. Number three resilient people themselves "Is what I’m doing helping or harming me?" This can be applied to different contexts is the way I am thinking and acting, helping or harming you in your bid to get that promotion or pass that exam,  to recover from a heart attack. Whether it is forgiving family transgressions or whether it is just asking yourself whether you really need that extra glass of wine, asking yourself whether what you are doing, the way you are thinking the way you are acting is helping or harming you put you back in the drivers seat.  3 strategies pretty simple and readily available to us any time anywhere I won’t pretend that thinking this way is easy but if I’ve learnt anything over the last two decades  it is that thinking this way really does help if you ever find yourself in a situation where you think "there’s no way I’m coming back from this"  I urge you to lean into these strategies and think again - Lucy Hone

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